Things I am good at: killing plants.

I do not have a green thumb.  I don't even have a green knuckle, or thumbnail, or anything of the sort.  I had a dill plant, it died within a week (not enough sun).  Then I tried planting some seeds of different herbs that enjoy the shade.  They sprouted and they were doing great for maybe a week, and then they died.  The plant food fertilizer may have been to much for them, and I may have been warned, and I still killed them. I have a corn plant and I think I'm slowly killing it because it's inside (but it's on NASA's list of plants that help clean indoor air!).

However, my roommate has found the perfect plant for our apartment.  It's also been here the longest; it's been alive for almost a year.  This is because of how this plant works.  You let it sit on the table and don't touch it until it looks like this:

Then it's time to water it.  In a matter of minutes, it will look like this:

So much happier.  So foolproof.  The only way to stay alive in this apartment if you're a photosynthesizer.  I think the only plant harder to kill is this one.